• Our minds

    have to sort through many types of stimuli,

    We develop mental capacities to deal with them but we also

    Deepen our ego’s distorted perceptions of being separate from

    the other ‘departments’ of the self.

    All issues

    must be fully realized, and understood…

    Before one can begin to Transcend them, Grow and Go Beyond

    ~ Click For Transcendence ~

    • The Psychology Behind the Zen of it All


      These mental departments become overwhelmed.

      Since we are not typically in True Awareness of our many mental capacities,

      These 'voices' carry on in the mind as if they are in charge.

      In other words,

      These ‘departments of egos’, distract us from logically and empirically

      taking the larger picture, the broader perspective,

      which one needs to make more balanced decisions.


      There are some emotional egos that our rational minds are so

      embarrassed or repulsed by that we choose to effectively ‘Dis-Own’ them.

      These ‘issues’ can’t simply be ‘disowned’ or

      we simply can’t be in denial of them - to make them go away.

      They go ‘covert’

      All issues must be fully realized, and understood…

      Before one can begin to Transcend them, Grow and Go Beyond


      When these mental departments become ‘Disowned’…

      They go undercover, they become a psychological ‘Shadow’.

      We don’t see this trait in ourselves now, but we are highly sensitive of this in others,

      So much that we are quick to be outraged.


      We can begin to experience ourselves more completely, and there’s no greater joy,

      than experiencing yourself as a Fully-Functioning Integrated Human Being.

      Once we begin to speak from a disowned voice, we begin the process of

      Re-Integrating it... and that process can take time...

      The Big Mind exercise expedites this 'learning curve'


      The psychology behind working thru our ‘shadows’ helps liberates us from

      the ‘hidden beatings’ we bring upon ourselves automatically and  ‘unconsciously’.




      By imagining that you, as an experiment,become’ that voice’.

      Take it’s perspective as fully as possible,

      Thus bringing to light these deeper insights to our consciousness.


      It is helpful, that as you take on the different ‘voices’, you should shift your position in your sitting.  Perhaps the Protector would sit rigidly upright whereas the Victim would hold a more insecure stance…

      These are just subtle ways to help us…  ‘become’ that voice’.


      ~ Sit comfortably and ‘breath into your meditative zone’ ~

      With the voice of your mind – ask to speak the voice of the Facilitator.

      The internal Facilitator will be the transition bridge to other voices.

      Ask the Facilitator to now speak to the

      Voice of the controller


      Get to know each of these voices within, and be mindful of other voices that arise.


      after you have completed your first Big Mind ‘voice dialog’ session,

      take your thoughts to an even deeper perspective by

      Taking notes

      Writing down your thoughts can also help sort out

      the new and deeper insights one has within.


      one may re-discover formerly ‘Dis-owned’ voices

      or ‘Shadow’ departments of our mind processes

      We may discover painful past emotions that were not resolved…

      but just swept under the carpet of our minds…

      We can then use the ‘Higher Departments of our minds’ to help resolve these issues

      as best as possible, thus allowing us to Transcend those issues.

      We transcend to higher and more adequate perspectives while

      Including the worthy components or acknowledging the wisdom of the experience

      as a whole to help Integrate a Wider and Deeper World View of Life,

      by living a more psychologically Balanced Life


    • Putting a 'Voice' to Mental Mind Processes

      These Voices that represent the many facets of our thought processes

      Fall into a few main category types.

      The Guardians

      Have instinctually become the animalistic sense of ‘self’

      In charge of protecting the ‘self’

      • The Controller

        Wants to control everything, loss of control is a big concern

        Wants to control self, then others, then everything, even  control time if it could...

        That’s his job description and the job is done thoroughly

        Why does controller control one's self?

        if the controller doesn't control the self,

        the universe will put ‘the self’ under control by the police, laws, embarrassment...

        The self feels entrapped, confined, bored, Totally un-appreciates the controller-

        This makes the controller feel bad,  betrayed…

        You now have to control harder! It feels threatening which manifests as a ‘cringe’,

        We shrug it off subconsciously but we feel it as tight muscle or an ache here or there…

        You control because? - To protect.

        While speaking As a controller

        ‘you’ -  Your facilitator voice - will need to get permission to speak with another voice …

        “May I now speak to the voice of…”


      • The Protector

        Protects me, the self from? …

        Attack,  Uncertainty, Self Doubt, Risks, Danger...

        Danger is Anywhere and always lurking around the corner, might even be

        Sleeping with the enemy... Physical, Emotional and Mental Pain,

        Looking good, shame, bosses & authoritative persons,  getting too excited,

        or having too many good feelings,  disappointment, loss,


        You not only protect the self, you also protect the family,

        You also have to protect the self from the self, because the self can get too high,

        too depressed,  drink too much, eat too much, let the body go to far...

        Protect from getting out of control - anger might lose control,

        greed, competitiveness, growth, lust, jealousy…

        And protect others from the self!


        It is a big full time job being the protector - Exhausting!

        So to protect, the protector creates barriers & walls, borders, boundaries,...

        When a barrier is breached, we sound the alarm, try to repair it then …                                            Build a bigger wall... and Bigger… until you finally build a dome...


        How does the self feel about what the protector does?

        The self feels constrained,  imprisoned by the protector.

        The protector does not feel good about the self's non appreciating.

        But still the job of the protector is to protect all the other voices

        But we often ‘disown’ our ‘mental departments… Like children,

        No one would think of locking them away tin the basement and ignore them,

        Same with our mind's voices.

        The guardians teams with the protector-

      • The Skeptic

        The Skeptic’s job is  to question everything - to doubt everything

        Is the voice constantly is looking for… 'what's in it for me

        Keeps the self from doing silly things...

        The self is so gullible, but the skeptic is very bright and smells out &

        seeks out insane stuff the self will fall victim of.

        Skeptical of others, the self's abilities -   also protects from being skeptical.

        The skeptic is skeptical of the other voices, skeptical of the self,

        The skeptic is the main barrier to enlightenment

      • FEAR

        The voice of fear –is always shouting ‘be afraid’,   Fear is not appreciated by the self


        I don't need appreciation, it's my duty, full time job, I fear because they are dangers.                 Afraid of death, change,  animation, being found out,  afraid of uncertainty but then

        Also afraid of certainty.

        Afraid to find out who I am. Afraid of  disappointment, afraid I might be nothing, ....

        Constantly alert to fear - job is to raise the alarm, tell the self to get out run, fight or flight...

        One of the real & import jobs of fear is to simply be aware of one's surroundings,

        (at the very least one will stumble or injure themselves less.)

        The self will try to disown fear...  Ignore, destroy & get rid of you


        Protects the self from portraying a sign of weakness the victim has

        The fear is that I won't have the courage

        The fear also helps the protector

      • The Victim

        The victim’s Job is - to Blame, blame everybody else AND the self at time

        You are persecuted by everybody else.

        So I the victim has emotions that lead to despair,

         that then lead to death.

        That's why the self must have control - speak with a disowned voice of your ‘Victim’

        The world is unfair, love telling my story, needs more protection, nobody understands,

        Why does it keep happening to me, I didn't have a choice,  tired of fighting,

         I just don't have the energy to fix it.

        I hold the suffering... Or at least the story of being the victim

        Very righteous,  the victim requires the ego to work for me because I am the victim,

        I am powerless,  I give & give & nobody appreciates it,

      • The voice of - Resistance

        Has only one job – That is to Resist – It silently shouts


        Usually not heard by the ‘self’ but felt almost continuously as on going tensions in the body,

        lack of energy, drowsy, spacing out,

        absent mindedness and trouble paying attention.


        I'm protecting the self by not letting the victim out,

        It will lead to death, depression, despair, weakness,

        The Protector will not allow the victim out


      • The Damaged Self


        Feels worthless,  the self is stronger because I take the damage,

        I was the excuse  to write other voices - used as the excuse - takes every bullet, rejection,

        takes in the hurt,  and when that bullet files you jump right in front of it.

        You are a hero, but you are damaged, no glory, It's just what I do - be damaged -

        You collect all the damage.

        Damage is not the victim of the story, you take all  the shit, but don't even get to tell the story.

        Somebody else would have been hurt, but you take all the hits so that

        all the other voices are perfect, whole and undamaged.

        The self will try to fix you,

        but you can't be fixed because that's what damage does damage is.


        "We do these exercises so to separate ourselves from our various 'voices' "


      • The Fixer

        Wants to fix the damaged self –

        I don't want to be 'done' - fix one thing & find another thing to fix.

        If you fix the self then you want to others...

        If it wasn't for me they'd all be broken, I can fix the universe, I can fix anything,

        I don't just try - I Do,  I'm a perfectionist, I can always make it better

      • The Vulnerable and Innocent Child


        Powerless, naive,  I trust everyone, the world is a mystery,

        pure, vulnerable child,

        you are unharmed, you trust you'll be taken care of,

        You offer Fun, Innocents, Creativity, Joy, New-ness, Specialty, Aliveness, Carefree, Curious, Open, Wonder, Sensitive, Honest, Integrity, Loving, Delighted, Open...

        You offer spontaneity,...

        What part of 'us' is this voice,  it's the true self, true nature

        True essence before the shit hit the fan.  Rich, abundant, free,

        Free to invent possibilities.


        All the other voices try to protect the vulnerable child.

        It's all about protecting this voice.

        ---- Sit as the vulnerable child ---

        Peaceful, Joyful, Exciting, Pure

        ~  "This Is meditation" ~


      • The Voices of Freedom


        These are the voices that take us beyond our current situation or understanding of life

        When we feel the ‘Inner Pull’ towards something that is so close…

        yet so much more than we can conceive or comprehend.

        To find that ‘Source’ of our Inner Pull’…

        there must be a ‘Way’


      • The voice of Desire


        I crave, I can’t get enough, I'm needy, always more, I yearn,

        I yearn for the next thing that will make me happier

        Insatiable Desire can become aggressive -  Nothing gets in my way of gaining my goal,

        Buddha says you're the cause of suffering,

        Where would the self be without desire?

        You desire food, shelter...  Desire is essential -

        The self does try to eliminate you or not let you out of the control's control.

        How do you cause suffering?? -

        you attach to what you desire, you attach to things that are pleasurable

        and desire those things that bring pleasure

        and you avoid pain.

        When one clings to a ‘desired’ outcome,

        it sends a big message to ‘the self’ that

        The self can Not be happy until the goal or goals are successfully achieved.

        Once one desire IS fulfilled, a new one or a new group of desires

        will keep one from ever being

        at one with the moment.


      • The Seeking Mind

        I seek enlightenment, I seek to understand, a better way of life, seeking the escape from pain.

         I seek what the desire desires.  I seek the wisdom to seek further

        Always seek    I carry desire to a higher level


      • The Mind that Seeks the Way

        I'm discerning, somewhat unfulfilled, frustrated with the ups & downs.

        Devoted to keep seeking.... You are seeking 'the way'

        The way is wisdom, the highest potential for all mankind     I seek meaning, purpose, peace,

        By seeking this it gives this to 'the self'.


        "The mind that seeks the way is awoken,"

        (and you are now awoken because I'm speaking to you)

        Gives meaning and purpose, motivation, direction,


        The Self likes to Cling or Grasp.

        The mind that seeks the way is awoken and offers the Bodhi mind to the conscious mind.

        The very 'seeking'... Is the Way.

        But then you will never be satisfied,

        but then you'll never be stuck in a rut because you will alway....

        Seek a new way.


        Zen masters say ‘life is a circle’,

        No matter where you are

        If you're near the end it just becomes the beginning again, and again...

        But don't get stuck where ever you are, keep moving.

        ~ Dukkha ~

        To be Stuck in a viscious cycle’

        is often translated and felt as “suffering,”

      • The Follower of the Way

        I follow the way - You need direction

        What has to be, so for you to follow the way –

        You need to get a glimpse of 'the way'... Or at least traces of 'the way'.


        I need something to give me an idea of which 'way' I should follow.

        Sometimes the self gets stuck,

        but the follower of the way is always following.

        Must have Faith & Trust.

        Must control the self to continue the way.

        To follow the way you must submit to the way.

        Must surrender :

        Fear, Control , Desires, Certainty, Attachment to what 'The Way' should look like.


        'Sit now as the follow the way' - ...

        Feels like freedom, sinking into it, it's easy...

        It heals itself

      • ~ Transcendent Voices - The Way ~

        The ability to put our egos into a proper perspective

        is an inherent quality of a psychologically healthy person.

        These voices are presented here separately only for

        the exercise of clear learning and understanding,

        For they are Not separate.

        They can be intuitively felt as an ‘Inner Pull’ or a Knowingness

        as they whisper subtly to the ‘self’


        The Way

        Stillness, nothing to do, beings, I'm everywhere, home,  full and empty, quiet,

        Everything fits

        The other voices are gone


        Time and space disappear, infinite and eternal,

        You are at one with your way.

        Sense of clarity,

        Peace, gratitude, welcoming of everything, appreciation,

        To have this consciousness every part of the day,

        Embrace everyone and everything with compassion,

        No judgment, and I can embrace the self.

        Boundless -  I'm 'Awake'.

        Totally present and in the moment.  It's effortless.

        The 'effort' was the seeking.


        Why is it so hard for the self to find you?

      • ~ Big Mind ~

        How big?

        The Big Mind is and encompasses all the departments of the mind.

         No boundaries.  No Parameters.  There's no limit what can be sensed,

        'Big Mind'  Does Not suffer, No desires, No seeking &....

        Big Mind is timeless, ...  Unborn & Undying -

        There is nothing that can be feared.

        As big mind

        Look at the self - what do you see?

        a part of me, a mental construct of me, the self is a contraction of me,

        it's all an expression of me, it's all of me,

        All the time.

        When the self wants to feel like it is the Big Mind...

        The self is finite & big mind is infinite,

        the self is limited, big mind is not.


        There is nothing that big mind is lacking or desires or seeks

      • ~ Big Heart ~

        Sit & think of how different Big Heart is from big mind -

        instead of emptiness I experience love, embrace everyone, compassionate, but not clinging....

        For everything.

        Unconditional excepting love, you take care of the self and everything, alleviate pain & suffering.  Want's to bond with everyone & liberate all beings...

        Has compassion, yet,

        Is emotionally detached from the pain of the emotions,

        Pain, suffering, sadness… it just not a relevant  or applicable condition of

        Big Heart.

        ~    ~    ~

        Completing the Great Spiritual Circle of Life

        The Vision of a Spiritual Kosmos

        Integrating the Ascending Love of 'Above' - 'Eros'

        and the Descending Love From Above - 'Agape'

        Embraced - so that Eros is balanced with agape


        Love and Concern for Each other is Preeminent

        Masculine and Feminine – Yin and Yang

         Wisdom and Compassion

        Emptiness and Form coming together in an ecstatic embrace

        that only Two Souls In True Love can share


        Big Heart's

        Yin Compassion

        Feminine Compassion aspect -  all is well and all things shall be well,

        the Yin embraces everyone equally.

        How do you heal the damaged self - love & heal, nurture it, let it be itself,

        everything will be ok,  you don't fix it, you just embrace and love it.


        Yang Compassion

        The masculine, very decisive, you can be ruthless when needed,

        Tough love, encouraging,  bring courage, love and strength, direction,

        You can offer discipline when appropriate.

        You offer the self - confidence, power to Be…

        Free of damage


      • ~ The Fully Integrated Free Functioning Human Being ~

        The Master of All Voices

        The one responsible, takes responsibility,  always at home, always awake

        Can't be deceived by any of the voices...

        Powerful clarity & full of wise choices, loving, adaptive,

        I accept my reality, it's fun,

      • American Zen Master Genpo Roshi

        ~ Zen Master D ~

        Dennis Paul Merzel

        Completed the Zuisse Ceremony at Sojiji and Eiheiji Temples in Japan,

        signifying the recognition of the authenticity of his Dharma transmission

        by the governing body of Soto Zen Buddhism in Japan,

        becoming the third Zen Priest outside Japan to be offered the title of

        Dai Osho (Great Priest) in the Soto Zen Tradition.


        In 1999 He created the Big Mind process

        This is having profound results in many fields, including psychotherapy, law, medicine, education, mediation, business, athletics, social work, family therapy, and work with prison inmates,      hospital patients and the dying.


        - PLEASE NOTE -

        This web site is only an "Introduction" to the Big Mind Process


        A reasonably healthy mind could read through and find some 'awakening' understanding

        of the many aspects of our Mind's Processes...

        Thus gaining better 'perspectives' towards more balanced and Integrated mental desisions.

        For those with a wee bit more deeper issues...

        Will benifit from the expartise of the trained practitioners of the Big Mind Big Heart


        Those in the position to Professionally Teach this Process

        Can be fully trained in the Deep rooted theroies required to go beyond this...

        'Tip of the Iceberg' Introduction'


        To study this Big Mind Process Properly, there are

        Three Paths for Study with Genpo Roshi


        maryellen@bigmind.org or 1-801-503-5656.



        ~ Also Note ~

        I have no affiliations with the wonderful folks of the Big Mind.


        I am not selling anything here

        It is part of my 'Service' to do what I can to help Awaken others.


        I am no Master - I do not know everything


        I am a  Servant - And I Do Know Somethings...

        Of Which, I'll share with You


        This is just one part of how I put my 'Spirit Into Action'

        By Offering a uniquic and clearly laid out Introduction to the wonderful Insights this process.

        My site offers  to the mentally balanced,

        Fully Integrated Free Functioning Human Being

        a perspective that can be quite useful in one's journey thru life.

        For most others...

        The Knowledge within these pages could invoke an urge to further

        'Seek their own Way'

        Arising as a Light that subtlety Inspires from Within

        The 'Call' of our Inner Pull


        ~ To Contemplate this ~

        Realize that this website and All Life

        Is just a Stepping Stone

        to what awaits us around the bend of Perception

        Roger Curley


    • The Next Phase - Course 808

      ~ Full Spectrum Mindfulness ~

      The Most Complete Perspectives of

      Human Conscious Stage Growth and Spiritual Awakening

  • Big Mind

    an Introduction by Roger Curley


    This Big Mind evaluation is created from ancient Zen,

    Transcended and Integrated into the Deepest aspects, practice and training of

    Modern Zen,

    Integrating Jungian Phycology techniques, thus,

    Manifesting a 'way'

    To look at the way ‘we - our -self' initially sees ... Life

    ~ Click For a Deeper Way ~


    This process compartmentalizes the countless parts of our mind

    and how 'it' thinks about certain situations.

    How the basic departments, or parts of 'us' operate.


    Once aware of these 'departments',

    we can study them empirically and not emotionally

    Then see any particular life issue from a broader perspective

    and render a better plan of action.

    This process

    Is what modern psychoanalyzing psychology strives to accomplish.


    By getting sort of ' in tune’ with or aware of' the various mental departments,

    We can better identify a path to take or a line of thinking

    that will take into account all of these departments

    in a rational, well thought out process.


    Take all of the basic departments and

    integrate with the Higher departments

    ~  It's That Simple  ~


    Dennis Genpo Roshi -  a modern American Zen Master -

    Presents 'our Being', our mind-body-spirit,

    as a Dysfunctional Company.

    Seeing how most of us don’t start out with a fully functional mind process,

    We don’t even realize

    that our minds operate so much like a Dysfunctional company.

    Most never realize that there’s a better, a more optimal way to function.

    Our life

    presents ever changing challenges and our fears, insecurities, doubts...

    which manifest as our Egos - which by their nature, each ego wants to assume

    'It' is the most important, and then becomes an un-mutable voice,

    that significantly shapes our thought process.

    This shows up in life naturally,

    say when you about to be run over by a train.

    Fear takes the complete, un-abashed authority to take center stage

    and make its Fears known.... Thus

    other 'departments' take over and inspire a quick sprint to da curb.

    That's natural, ... all good....


    This happens even with the 'lower realms of ego, like

    if you think someone is trying to cleverly insult you, or is

    out right verbally pitching a shit fit to you.   At this point, to most folks,

    many departments of our ego will rise up and assume that they are the most violated and must take command.


    Most often in Life...

    We do not benefit from this behavior,

    it's like speaking out of our ass,

    but in the case of our minds...

    we can be tooting from

    a very large and ever changing number of 'orifices'


    The Big Mind Process uses, in part ,

    The Jungian therapeutic technique practice of 'Voice Dialog',

    Designed to expand the individual's ability to make choices in life

    rather than to behave in an automatic and unconscious fashion,

    highly influence by our emotions and egos.


    It allows a person to step out of their ego,

    Take a bigger and more encompassing

    Balanced Perspective on the Life Issues at hand.


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