Zenfully Quool Quotes Quommentary
by rog
as the ‘Maui Marrying Man’…
I’ve heard hundreds of people’s Luv Stories.
Many of marriages we take part in is often a 2cd or 3rd try…
Most failed marriages are due to the fact that
the couples were not good ‘gardeners’ of their
‘Garden of life’.
This takes a skill that often takes one their whole life to perfect.
We are all born with the same self-centered perspective…
Babies literally feel they are the center of existence…
Then,
They learn that there is also a ‘mommy’… then a ‘daddy’…
Perhaps a brother or sister…
As we grow and mature…
We become less ‘self’ centered and more family centered or ‘centric’…
Then school centric
Town centric… state country centric…
Then those that allow themselves to evolve properly become…
World centric.
A metric of one’s psychological growth development is
how well they can relate to another person’s perspective…
How well they can “walk in their shoes”.
The more perspectives one can integrate into their perspectives…
The more empathy, compassion, love, joy and understanding
they will have for others.
If we get married before we’ve learned to take on the perspectives of others…
We will simply not be capable of offering true
empathy, compassion, love, joy and understanding
to their newly wed partner.
Sure…
When your head over heals in love…
You are overwhelmed with a love trance…
And as long as the honeymoon is sizzling hot…
Everything is fine… even for those that are not
psychologically and emotionally evolved.
But…
When the honeymoon is over…
And often, all it takes is to forget to put the lid back on the toothpaste
or forget to take the garbage out once too often…
Then…
The self-centered, underdeveloped ego will take over
all reasoning, thoughts, speech and actions.
Often the marriage dissolves…
The down payment for a house goes to lawyers and spousal support…
Then,
Life goes on… not so… “happily ever after”.
But,
As wise Sages point out:
“Everything that has happened… Had to”.
Not because of fate or mystical ‘karma’…
But,
Since the couples was not good ‘gardeners’ of their ‘garden of Life’…
This dismal outcome was a natural progression of not growing up.
For a lot of people…
This first marriage is a wake up call to…
Wake Up, Show up and Grow up!
Then, when they met another more evolved mate
that has gone through similar learning experiences…
There is natural component in their ‘Garden of Life’.
They both have grown and learned by experience:
True empathy, compassion, understanding, joy and Love…
They are no longer mainly self-centered but now
humble their egos and put the other’s perspective first
or at least properly integrated with theirs.
These couples have indeed learned the profound lessons of being…
Good ‘Gardeners of their Life’.
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